Really? - Is that how its going to be?

I don't know what's going on. I guess i'm just not all that easy a person to get along with these days. It seems like everywhere I turn people are jumping down my throat. Of course the only person who might really be reading this is NOT who i'm talking about. Sorry by the way. I was rude and I apologize.
But I get home from having a pretty good time aside from the fact that my best friend wasn't talking to me. And I have this totally awesome message from my sister. Pretty much saying, "Thanks for being a backstabber." EXCUSE ME?
For the record, I emailed him ONCE while he was on his mission becuase SHE wanted me to get to know him. It's not my fault that he emailed me back. And yes, he's home now and I still talk to him. So what?!! She's married now and she dumped him, not me. I'm not going to stop being friends with someone because they are an ex of someone I know. Friend, sister, mother, whoever! You broke up with him, not me! And your saying i'm being disrespectful? How dare you question my motives. I'm friends with him because he's friends with me. And i'm not going to kick him to the curb because you want me too. Sorry, that's just not how I roll.
And another thing, I recall her being friends with someone that she NEVER would have met, aside from going through my myspace list and adding whoever might have been the cutest. Do you think I appreciated that at all? NO! You have you own God-Damned friends leave mine alone!!!
So, by popular demand. I suppose I'll drop from the face of the earth. If someone happens to send a rescue sometime in the future, great. Until then?....Peace out homies.

What did I do this time? - It hurts when...

I don't appreciate people assuming things. My motives and/or feelings. They don't KNOW why I do what I do and I don't like it when they assume its for some stupid reason when its far from that. I've decided...aside from those in my ward for work reasons (which is the only thing I call them for anyway), I will no longer be in any sort of contact with certain people. I won't write them or call them or help them. If they are going to automatically assume that i'm calling for something dumb and they are going to ignore me and my messages...then i'm not going to ask them for help anymore. It's a good thing Nathan and Spencer answer their phone because nobody else will give me the time of day. I need a few more supplies that's all I ask...but I can't even get them to answer the phone when I want to offer them dinner. So you know what? Bugger off Jeffrey!

Sorry Homie - Please forgive

Okay, so I was a little angry with Elder Creer. But i'm good. I had them over for dinner tonight and we had a great talk. He has changed a lot but for the better. That's a good change, a great change.
I bore my testimony in church today. I needed that. During part I had said, "I don't know if i'm supposed to go on a mission or if that's what i'll end up doing." Creer's face was kinda funny when i said that. He freaked out. He was like, "what homie? since when? why?" When I finished what I was saying he felt better. haha.
I was challenged to get one more baptism before I leave...that's a little much! So we settled at a firm. We'll see what I can do. I know that if I pray for the chance and honestly strive to reach this goal that I will make it if it is God's will that it be so. I would love to have a firm before I leave. So would Elder Creer because that means he gets one more baptism before he goes home...haha. I'll share a baptism with him. I'm totally okay with that. Heck i've shared 'em with everyone else. I wouldn't want Creer to feel left out. haha.
Goodnight!

SCREW THIS - we'll see if I ever do anything for them again.

So here's the deal. A long time ago when I was still graced with Elder Rasmussen's presence in Stockton, he had a companion named Elder Creer.

Elder Creer was only actually in Stockton for 6 days, until someone in Sacramento got into a car accident and he was given clean-up duty and was Emergency Transferred (ET'd) out of here. Well those six days were awesome. We fed them dinner at The Creamery, and it was really good. We saw them at church and I think a few other times. Over all it was fun.

Well, when he was ET'd, President Huff promised him that he would be coming back to Stockton before he went home. This being his last transfer, we knew he would be here.

While my Mom was on the phone to Elder Stirland talking about Easter Baskets, I was lucky to find out that he was serving in the YSA ward as a ZL with Elder Malley. I wanted to do something cool for him to welcome him back to the area, and seeing as I had previously made a bunch of the Elders shirts....it just seemed like the perfect thing to do.

So Nik and I made the shirt, a poster, and a plan. Tonight being his first night back in Stockton, it was the perfect time for a welcoming committee. So we took the shirt, in a cute little gift bag; the poster, and some window chalk. We headed out at about 10:15 pm. This way we would be there at right about lights out at 10:30.

When we get there we scope the place out a bit. First we put the bag and the poster on the front porch. Then head around to the back to wait so that we could write on the window.

We waited.......

and waited......

and waited. The effing mexican missionaries were still in their proselyting (pros) clothes. And one of them has been on the phone since we got there!

It is now 11:15. Elder Malley and Elder Creer had just barely gone to bed, and the other two had "bedtime" absolutely no where in any of their future plans. It was fricken unbelievable.

The really odd thing is that we weren't exactly being quiet. They didn't hear, see, or suspect a thing.

So we're fed up. We decided to screw the window chalk, we rang the doorbell, and booked it around the building. When we get to the back door again, NOBODY HAS ANSWERED THE DOOR YET!!!! The mexican mosy's on over and opens the door, still on the phone. He looks down at the bag, yells something back into the apt. then looks around outside a little bit. The jerk then proceeds to take the bag into the kitchen, leaving the door open. The bag is clearly marked for Elder Creer, he is not Elder Creer...BUT HE GOES THROUGH THE BAG ANYWAY!!!! After a few he goes back to the door and looks at the poster. Still on the phone, its now 11:34, he reads everything off to his special telephone friend. If they weren't the ZL's, let me tell you, I wouldn've called them to rat out the stupid phone hog!

He finally takes the poster off the door and takes it into the kitchen. Elder Malley and Creer are still in bed. After about 5 more minutes he closes the door. He goes into Nathan's bedroom to tell him what's going on. He comes back out and takes the bag and the poster into the bedroom.

Elder Creer is pretty lazy as he plainly showed us tonight, he barely sits up in his bed as he looks through the bag and reads the poster. A few minutes later and the lights are off, Elder Creer and his companion are back in bed. (separate beds mind you!) And the stupid mexican missionary, STILL in his pros, goes and lounges his butt on the couch while he chats on the phone...wayyyy past his bedtime.

I have to say i've had some pretty lame experiences with the missionaries. But this one trump's them all. Hate is a strong word...but i'm feeling it for the mexican missionaries right now! We'll see if I ever do anything for them, EVER again!

No Time for You - Busy, Busy, Busy!

As you can plainly see, the clock is running out. When I look at the calendar I still have plenty of time right? Then why does it feel like i'm getting down to the wire? I feel like I just don't have enough minutes in the day. Even right now, I should either be studying or sleeping. It just feels like sooner or later, its all going to cave in. Then my oxygen will run out and then where will I be? Stuck where no one can hear me scream. I need help but I don't know where to turn, or who to ask. I guess its true even more than most days. All we can do is pray.

Happy Easter - Remember

Everyone be sure to have a very Happy Easter! Spend time with your family and have a blast. Remember why we celebrate this day. Jesus Christ suffered in the Garden of Gethsemane and died on the Hill Calvary for us, because he loves each and every one of us so much. Take the time to thank Him, even if its just a short prayer in you heart. Make sure He knows that you are grateful for what he's done for you. Also, take the time to serve another. No matter how big or small, service is a Christlike attribute that we all must strive for.

I love you all!

OVERWHELMED - When it all comes crashing down

Long days at work paired with auto shops closed after five linked to registration and insurance being due makes for a hell of a hard time getting your car fixed and having the money for any of the above. Aside from gas prices cars really aren't all that expensive until they totally break down. Maybe that's how those mechanics make all that money is by closing at 5. Because of their hours you put off getting your car fixed until the hole is too deep and you have no choice but to take a day off work. This sucks.

Then we've got all those other bills we have to pay for. Credit cards, phone, dental, medical, rent, etc. I don't have any medical insurance so my bills are 3 times what most others medical bills cost. Since my employer doesn't provide medical its probably worth it to get it myself but I can't afford that because i'm paying off my medical bills. Catch 22.
I don't get any funds or a reimbursement for moving for my work so I also have to come up with gas money to drive across 3 states.

Remember when you wanted to be an adult. How you thought it was so cool to be able to do anything you wanted. Well they didn't tell us that you have to pay out your ear for it. Thanks for the info parents.

Responsibility is not all its cracked up to be. Especially when, due to uncontrollable circumstances, you are thrown into it at the early age of 11. Cooking, cleaning, changing diapers on twins while making sure that the boy is entertained and the other 3 finish their homework and chores. All the while you have to go out of your way, for the safety of the family, to make sure your dad doesn't get pissed off. You have to take care of your mother who has cancer and can't do anything but lay in bed. AND, you have to get your own homework and chores finished.

If nothing else, it was quite a learning experience. It got me where I am today and i'm happy with that. And those experiences will stick with me my whole life. They will help me with a lot, the most important being...I don't want my children to go through the same things that I did at such an early age. I want them to be responsible but there are other ways of teaching them that responsibility.

I know my parents didn't do it on purpose. I'm not stupid things just happen. But now that i've been throught that, I know the things I need to do to avoid those situations...for the most part anyway. I mean I HOPE that I don't get cancer, but if it happens i'm sure my husband and I will be able to handle it. Being through it from my point of view, it may be easier for me to help my kids through it.

Over all, responsibility sucks! But we all get stuck with it...so make the most of it. And change your auto shop hours so that you're open AFTER people get out of work.

Softball - Hi, i'm your....coach?

Last year at Southern Virginia University I played third base for the Knights softball team. We had a pretty bad year (due to the fact that most of our players had no softball experience) but it was the time of my life.

Coach Smith left me on the bench most of the season until our last game when, for reasons unknown, Kimberly refused to play. I was up, as confident as ever. Not one ball went by me. After the game I was asked by Coach, "Where was that all season?"

Of course I had to answer with the obvious, "On the bench."

I was a little TO'd that he had hardly played me all year, but every minute was worth it.

We just recently moved into a new ward in our stake and our Visiting Teacher Kristin was over immediately. We talked a bit about softball and she told me that her husband coaches. "I would love to help coach a team I think that would be so much fun!"

Well the next Sunday my Mom actually talked to Joey. "I would love to have someone with her experience help me coach!"

YAY ME!!!

I started yesterday just kind of assisting with the pitchers and catchers practice. Today was the whole team practice and it was time for me to, "step up to the plate." I was doing my best to give the girls tips, keep them motivated and beat the lazy out of them. No, no, I'm just kidding about the beating them part. I'm sure they'll deserve it later though.

Haha, no, I love these girls. They are all really good at what they do, they just need a fire lit under them. I'll only be here for another month, but I will do my best to get them motivated for the season.

I'm already sore, which in "Holly" means that I'm already having a total blast!

DIRTDEVILS DOMINATE!!!

WOW - Uhm, I really am leaving!

I'm sorry last nights post was so brief. But I was really excited, you know shaking couldn't walk, couldn't evan talk kind of excited. And then it started sinking in. And all I could think was, "How am I supposed to move out of state in one month?...BY MYSELF!" I've done it before....kind of...but something about this seems different. Oh wait, EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS IS DIFFERENT! I'm moving for a job, not school. And I am officially the only adult supervision I will have. Not that that's a bad thing at all its just...surreal.
Yes, technically I've been an adult for the past 3 years but if you know anything about me and my family...let me just put it this way. My Mom will let me get away with acting like a child. But I can't do that anymore. That fact actually makes me really, happy!
I am going to miss my family, and my friends so much. But my favorite part of all of this is that they support me. They know that its the best thing for me, and for them...otherwise it would not be happening.
So, I have one month to pay two months worth of bills. I have to get my car a tune-up, a full-size spare, insurance, and registration. I have to buy the essentials like shampoo, conditioner, cotton swabs...etc. (ooh, i need rubbing alcohol) And I have to pay for gas out there, food, and at least 2 weeks worth of whatever I need when I get there. Whoa! (I hope this Jordan thing really pays off.)
The point is, I am happy to be making the next step in life. It's going to be tough, but I know that I can do this. I guess i'm just asking you to 'know it' with me.

I'M MOVING - Peace out skillet!

I GOT THE JOB!!! I have to be in Colorado on April 26th. Wish me luck.

How do you feel about Colorado Springs? - APX

If you know anything about a Mormon Singles Ward...then you know about the Security Boys. Every summer, every Singles ward has 10-20 new boys from out of town. They work for security, pest control, and sattelite companies. They're usually all returned missionaries (RM's). And they do pretty much the same thing that they previously did on their missions, but instead wearing white shirts and ties and spreading the Gospel... they wear polo shirts and shorts and sell security systems.

I want to have this job.

I've met a few of these guys in the past. And my cousin's ex works for Apex Alarms as a hiring manager. My brother-in-law is going down to San Antonio this summer to sell. So I should have some pull into getting a job for them right? Wrong! Apparently no matter how many people you know at Apex you still gotta do it yourself. So I did.

Last Friday I went onto Google to find information about Apex. The website gave me a bit of information and the opportunity to turn in a resume. So I did. This is what my email looked like...besides the attachment of my resume.

"To whom it may concern:

Although my recent job history lacks sales experience I want to stress to you that I am capable of anything you place before me. I know the physical and mental demands this job requires and I am willing and able to reach if not exceed those demands. I would love the opportunity to work selling door to door. I am ready for any and all challenges such a career might bring to my life. Please consider my application as more than just a request for a job, but a request for a new beginning. I meet all the requirements listed on your website for the job and I know that I can bring more to your company. Thank you for taking the time to consider me as an employee.

Sincerely,
Holly J. Sommerville"

Because I sent the email late Friday night, I wasn't expecting any feedback until sometime this week. Well much to my glad surprise I recieved an email this morning from a guy named Mark.

"Holly,I read your email. I am a sales manager for apx alarm, my name is mark bench. Please call me when you get this ###-###-####. I'm interested in sitting down with you and discussing your potential career at apx. Thank you"

I could not hold back a smile. I got butterflies and the chills and I was shaking all at the same time. I was so excited that my resume triggered a response so quickly.

I finished up work at Jordan's and then I left to get the kids. I got out of Jordan's pretty early and didn't want to waste gas...so I just went straight over to the kids school. I could wait for an hour no problem.

While I was waiting I decided to call Mark. He answered and immediately started asking me a bunch of questions. "Where are you from? How old are you? Are you single? Would you have any concerns with moving?" Stockton, California, 20, yes, and you can move me ANYWHERE! I have no problems with moving.

He asked me how I heard about Apex and he continued to give me some more information about the company, the pay-scale, and why he is taking his crew to Colorado Springs. My first thought was, "Colorado Springs!!! Yess...so long as it isn't Stockton." My second thought, "I just hope my Dad and Sheri don't know that I'm there." My third, "This guy sounds like he's already made up his mind, AND I'M HIRED!!!"

He was telling me how he was "intrigued" by my email and I sounded really driven. "I need some one like you."

He also told me that this is the hardest job I could ever have. "I need one of those," I said.

He's going to email more information later tonight and wants to talk to me a bit more. He said, "I think in order to get you your trainging I may have to fly out there for a weekend but we'll take care of it." Does that sound like a, "When can you start?" to anyone else?

I am so excited. I need this so much. Pray for me!

Its War!! - Don't ever play pranks on the missionaries!

Okay, so I know that I just posted earlier today, but I had a request for the story of my prank war with the missionaries. Not the best idea I ever had.

One Wednesday night we were having Elder Bryce Barron and his companion Elder Tate Hansen over for dinner and a discussion with Ashley Lowe.

They showed up early so, Ash and I were kind enough to allow them to wash our cars!

They did such a good job that we had to thank them somehow. So we did, after they went to bed we thanked them...all over their car!

The window chalk is water proof so they had to rub it off I guess. Apparently it took them an hour and a half to get it all off. And poor Elder Baby Hansen got a blister. Boo-fricken-hoo!

The next day I didn't get my usual morning phone call from Bryce so I knew that it was becuase they were plotting against me. At about 10:30 am, right after I finished telling her the whole story, my Mom gets a call from their apartment. She answers it cautiously. "Hello?"

"Hello ma'am. This is Elder Huckvale, I'm an assistant up here in Sacramento. Is there a Holly Sommerville available ma'am?" My mom instantly started shaking.

"Yes there is, one moment please." She pulls the phone from her ear and covers the reciever. "HOLLY YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE! It's one of the assistants! He wants to speak with you." She was totally freaking out.

I wasn't buying it for a minute. "Hello? This is Holly."

"Yes, Holly Sommerville? This is Elder Huckvale. It seems that we have a problem." Oh boy, here we go! "I have Elders' Barron and Hansen here in the office with me," Bull! The caller id said it was their apartment and they hadn't gotten cell phones yet...but i'll play along, "Were these two Elders at your home last night?"

"Yes they were. We had a dinner appointment with them, and then they were teaching a discussion. What's the problem?" I totally recognize the voice but it's not Hansen or Barron...who is it?

"I understand that the investigator they were teaching is also a girl?"

What kind of question is that? "Yes she is...so?"

"Holly, was there a chaperone with you last night? We understand that there may be some inappropriate things going on between you and one of these Elders,"

I just realized, it's Elder Hiatt, Hansen and Barron's roommate. I'd never met him in person but I had talked to him a few times. "Yah, my dad was here...and so was the rest of the family." Oh man, he's really trying.

"Was the chaperone actually IN the home?"

"He was in the room! Elder, I don't see what the problem could be. I promise nothing inappropriate was happening. That's gross, if I wanted a missionary I'd find a cuter one than either of those two!" At this point I can hear giggling in the background and Elder Hiatt is also trying not to laugh. My Mom is totally freaking out. I had her going the whole time. Bonus points for pranking my Mom too!

After straining to regain his composure Hiatt continues, "So then what happened to the car? We understand that there may have been some damage done to it?"

Hahaha, damage. You're so clever. "Well I wouldn't call it damage. Unless the 'Princess' line damaged Barron's ego!" Hiatt's really laughing now. "Elder Hiatt you're going to have to try harder if you want to fool me!"

BUSTED!

"Oh, man...how'd you know it was me?" I only talk to the kid on the phone every night and he thinks I wouldn't recognize his voice? What a fool! "Come on Elder Hiatt, really? You called from the apartment and expect me to believe that you are in Sac? You're really bad at this."

"Well we had to get you back somehow."

"Try harder!" And I hung up the phone. My Mom was totally confused and she was raging when I explained it to her.

Well that was fun, I thought it was over...thought they'd given up and I had won. I thought too soon. Never underestimate the power of the missionaries.

The next morning was Saturday. I was planning to sleep in for a very long time. My plans came to a screeching halt when I was awakened by my sister Courtney. "Holly, what did you do to your car?"

What!? It was too early for this.... I got out of bed and dragged myself outside. Lo and behold...

Yes. They put chocolate syrup and cookies all over my car! "Don't play with fire?" Yah, except too bad they spelled 'chastity' wrong. Okay, it's official...ITS ON!

Monday night it was Courtney, Candace and me. This was more of a 'just for fun'...as opposed to a 'revenge' kind of thing. We made posters that said "Tag, you're it!" We put that on their door and hung little fake missionary tags all over the place. We also put dish soap all over their car windows so that when they tried to rinse it off it just lathered up. Oh...and I put the cookies and the chocolate syrup bottle, that they left on my lawn, on their doormat.

The plan was doorbell ditch. Candace wouldn't do it and I was driving so Court was up. We pulled around the corner where we could still see their front door and Court made her way up the stairs. Now, while we were 'decorating' their front door their lights were still on. We could've been caught at any moment. But soon the lights went out, right before Courtney rang the doorbell. "Ding-dong," she made a dash for it. The lights went on in a second and three out of the four missionaries were out the door. Mission accomplished, except there was one problem...COURTNEY RAN THE WRONG WAY! Now she was stuck in the back of the complex hiding behind the dumpster! I freaked out, I didn't know what to do. I couldn't go get her, I couldn't even communicate with her or we all would've been busted. So I just stood there watching, and waiting.

Barron and Hiatt were looking everywhere for the culprit. And Hansen was using a small Halloween bucket to rinse the soap off the windows. As I just sat, and waited.

After a few minutes Hiatt and Barron were back at the top of the stairs. Just standing there chatting, while Hansen continued to wash the car. I had no idea what I was supposed to do. I was about to go confess when suddenly I saw Courtney peeking aroung the corner. She was trying to figure a way out but I just told her to go hide. We'd wait for them to go inside and then I'd go save her.

As Courney tucked herself back into the corner, the missionaries all went inside. The soap would have to come off tomorrow. "Ok," I thought, "in a few more minutes, they'll be sound asleep and I can go rescue Courtney."

Wrong again. All of a sudden the three Elder's ran outside and came sprinting down the stairs running in seperate directions. It was an ambush! They figured someone still had to be back there and they were going to find her.

I heard a scream, then a little bit of argueing, and someone saying, "hold her right there!" Elder Hansen came around the corner, picked up his candy bucket and filled it with water. As he turned back I heard some yelling and then I heard loud footsteps. Courtney bolted. She came running around the corner faster than a speeding bullet and she was soaked.

They made a feeble attempt to run after her but soon gave up as we honked back to them and drove out of sight. Courtney was the hero! And for her, I had to get them back...one last time!

This one had to wait. It couldn't be the next night or even the next two nights. They would be expecting that. But more importantly, my Mom could not find out. They had recruited her to call them with a warning whenever we were on our way. This attack had to be totally confidential. But in order to pull it off, I needed one more recruit. Laurie Ponce.

It was perfect! Every tuesday night the missionaries had dinner at the Ponce's house. They would never expect us to strike in broad daylight. All Laurie had to do was keep them away from the front window. And to my surprise, she agreed!

Tuesday 5:35 pm, Laurie texted me. "They're all here. We are just sitting down. Get in and get out FAST!" We were off. Chocolate syrup, crushed nuts, honey, marshmallows, and whipped cream, all over! Best of all. They weren't the only Elder's there! Elder Chavez and Elder Gregory were also there. And Elder Chavez was a homophobe! So for him...a rainbow, gay symbols, and a ton of San Francisco reference's. I only wish I had pictures of the damage....or more importantly...pictures of their faces when they saw it! VICTORY!

Sister Ponce, however impressed she was, was regretful. She had told the missionaries that it needed to end and called me and told me the same, and that she never should have agreed to help me. I was totally bummed. We won but I felt so crappy. I wrote apology notes to all of the Elders. And it was over.

That night I recieved a call from Elder Chavez, "Hey Holly, how you doin?"

He told me what had happened on his end and how Sister Ponce had asked them to end it and they agreed, with fingers crossed. Barron had told Chavez from the beginning what was going on and Chavez was stoked to help him out. He said that he was so excited that I pulled him into the game too. He said he felt like it was an invitation to have fun with us and he loved it. They were going to make it a "Zone Activity" to get me back! If you thought I was bummed before, this took the cake.

After a long chat Chavez and I came to the conclusion that Laurie was right, it was fun while it lasted but it needed to end. We had decided it was a draw and that it was over.

I had the time of my life and I will never forget my prank war with the missionaries. And Courtney is still my hero for taking the bucket on that cold night in Stockton.

$10,000 - Funds for a Mission

Okay, so for a Sister, a mission costs between 8 and 10 thousand dollars. Which equals out to about 400 dollars a month, give or take. I don't have 8-10 thousand dollars. The money is supposed to come from 3 resources. First; the prospective missionary, second; the family, and third; the Church...in that order. Money is always the problem.
Unfortunately I don't have a job right now, which really SUCKS because I need to pay my bills. You see, in order to serve a mission you can't have any debt...I have about 4 G's worth of it. Nothing campared to some people but i'm 20 years old. I shouldn't have any debt. Anyway, I've been working on getting these things paid for but then I got laid off last month. So, as you can see I have a little bit of a situation.

* * * *

The first time I met with Bishop Doughty, after speaking with my parents, we had decided that I needed to pay off my bills, my Mom would pay $200 a month and my Dad would pay $200 a month. Sounds great. However, it doesn't look like my Dad is going to be helping me out with anything, anytime soon. And there is NO WAY that my Mom can afford even the $200 let alone $400.
You see where my problem is? I've already had to put it off for 8 months. And now Bishop tells me that I may have to put it off for another year after that! This seems so unfair. I understand that sometimes these things happen. And I'm ready for the challenge. And if I absolutely have to wait I will but...it just sucks is all.
Recently I turned in an application to work for Apex Security Company. My cousin's ex is a hiring manager for them and he's trying to help me out a bit. I hear you can make a lot of money doing this type of sale. Someone my sister knows made about 53 grand in one summer. And then some girl Nikki knows made almost a million dollars in just 3 short months. Now I'm not expecting to make nearly that much. But I know that if they just give me a chance that i can make at least enough to pay of my bills and maybe a third of my mission.
I really need this job. And I'll do whatever it takes to get it. That's how badly I want to go on a mission. I'll do whatever I can to make the money that I need. Provided that its legal! No matter what the challenge I'll step up to the plate and come out swinging.
I kind of have a job...its only $8 and hour but its full-time. The problem is this guy practically wants me to run his business...I can be a great employee but i'm not necessarily CEO material. But like I said, I'll come out swinging. I'm taking this job and I'll do my best but I am just PRAYING that Apex gives me a call. That would make my life.

Nick - The Whole Story

Nicholas Goodwin was my 3rd baptism. That's right, I said MY baptism. Out of 4 there is 1 - Ashley Lowe; and old friend from high school, 2 - Christian Rios; Nick's little brother, 3 - Nick, and 4 - Mandy Pendegraft; one of Courtney's friends from high school. We met Christian thru Nick...but Christian got baptized first.

One very cold, very dark Sunday night, I was on a 'Blitz Armada' with the missionaries. We were working in the Lincoln Ward area for the Sister Missionaries; Sister Tilby and Sister Fuapau.

I was paired up with Sister Fuapau and we were only a few blocks away from the church. We walked up and down those streets knocking on door after door getting nowhere. It was about time for us to turn in but we had one more street and we decided we weren't giving up yet.

We saw a kid walking across the street from us so we went over to GQ him. He was 18 years old...singles ward territory, and said that he was Athiest but he was interested in learning about any religion, so we gave him a pamphlet...and just so that he could see we were normal people, invited him to a P-day BBQ we were having the next day at my cousin Nikki's house.

The first day I met Nick he was totally Goth, dressed all in grungy black and he was smoking a cigarette. He came to the BBQ and pretty much told everyone there that he was just looking for something to do and would never be any more interested in the church. But I wasn't giving up just yet.

When I asked Elder Rasmussen (Zone leader and in the Singles ward) if he was going to set up a teaching appointment he just said, "I'm not going to waste my time, you heard what he said." I told him how I felt, I thought that it was worth pursuing and I was mad that he was just going to let Nick walk away like that. So he gave me an assignment, "Holly," Elder Rasmussen said, "I want you to take Nick under your wing. He's your find, your teach, your baptism. I know you can do this."

OH MY HECK! That's a lot of responsibility, but it was a challenge I had to accept.

So I made short term goals that would eventually lead to the ultimate goal, baptism. Goal #1 - Fellowship. My cousins and I were going to the Corn Maze that Friday, so I called Nick and invited him. Just a friend, no pressure. In the car he was asking us a few questions about the Church so of course we answered him. We had a lot of fun at the Corn Maze and at the end of the night Nick was my last drop off. He saw a copy of The Book of Mormon that I always keep in my car and he wondered if I could give him a copy. Goal #2 - Teaching. So I grabbed the book and a pen, wrote down my testimony in the front cover and said, "it's yours." I committed him to reading at least the testimonies.

When I talked to him the next day he'd only read a couple pages but he agreed to come to church with me. Goal #3 - Attendance. He dressed in his usual drab and had his cigarettes with him. But he stayed for the full three hours and the baptism afterward. He said that he was a little impressed and he agreed to attend the Cottage Meeting the next Wenedsay. Goal #4 - Firm.

On the way to the Cottage Meeting, dressed in the same exact clothes he wore on Sunday, he was asking Nikki and me a few more questions about the church but we weren't getting very far. At the meeting he seemed pretty interested but when asked by Elder Abeyta if he had felt the spirit his direct quote was, "Yeah, I think I did. But to be honest with you, I don't care." My goals were not met. I was absolutely crushed.

However, with very little enthusiasm, I called him on Saturday to invite him to church...his phone was shut off. That's it, he was gone. Elder Rasmussen and Elder Dipo were very understanding. They explained to me that this kind of thing happened a lot and there is just nothing we can do about it. I tried to move on.

The next week on Thursday, I recieved a call from a number I did not recognize. "Hello?"

"Holly! Hi, how are you?" I did not recognize the voice on the other end and I was a little freaked out.

"Who is this?" I snapped.

"It's me Nick. Nicholas Goodwin, I went to church with you and stuff." Total shock came over me!

"Oh, sorry. Hi, how are you?"

I was totally confused. He explained how his phone had been turned off and he'd been trying to remember my phone number for the whole week. He was very upset that he had not been to church the last week and explained the he wanted to attend regularly. He also said that he wanted to start meeting with the missionaries. As luck would have it, Elder's Dipo and Rasmussen were having dinner at my house the next day so I made plans to pick up Nick. When I told Elder Rasmussen that Nick would be there for his first discussion he was really impressed, "That's awesome Holly! How'd you swing that?"

All I could muster was an, "I don't know."

The next day I pulled up to Nick's house to pick him up. I didn't have to walk very far to the door, someone was sitting on the front porch. "Hi. Is Nicholas here?" I asked.

"Holly, its me!" I did not even recognize him. He was wearing much nicer, CLEANER, clothes than he had worn in the past. And he just had this charisma that wasn't there before. I felt like I was talking to a total stranger.

So we get back to my house, and while the Elders are teaching Nick I was cooking dinner. I was still trying to hear what they were saying and they weren't speaking very loudly. It seemed to be going okay, not too well, but not bad. I was barely listening when Nick said straight out, "I want to get baptized!" I dropped a pot on the kitchen floor. (good thing it was empty) I could see that the Elder's were trying to hold back their total surprise and as I picked up the pot, and my jaw, off of the kitchen floor and apologized for inturrupting, I could not hold back a smile. Somehow, obviously by no power of my own, this grungy kid I met on the street was asking us to help him recieve the Gospel. I will never forget that feeling.

Nick dropped smoking like a hot potatoe, but he had a little trouble with the drinking. Elder Rasmussen was transferred but Nick loved Elder Halabuk so it worked out. Elder Dipo, Elder Halibuk and myself met with Nick every night to make sure that he was doing okay. We took him on a blitz which he loved and decided that when the time was right he too wanted to serve a mission. And after a few set backs, and his little brothers own baptism, Nicholas Kyle Goodwin was finally baptized on December 16th, 2007. Success.

Unfortunately, I had to leave soon after for Colorado. I was gone for a few weeks and didn't talk to Nick much. I tried calling but he was out a lot with the missionaries. I wasn't too worried. I was only back in town for a month before I went to Colorado again for my sisters wedding. I didn't talk to Nick at all and last I heard he was drinking again. He doesn't return my calls and I've tried visiting. I'm not sure what happened that made him fall away so soon. But it's hard to see a good friend go.

Despite my disagreements the missionaries assured me that it was nothing I did. "Sometimes this kind of thing happens. The important thing is what you gave him. Your friendship, your love and support, and most importantly, a special gift. The gift of the Holy Ghost. He will always have that, and someday he will see how important it is to him. Someday he will remember that he has a testimony. He will remember how it felt to be clean and forgiven. He will remember you Holly and what you gave him. And he will come back into the fold. Just keep him in your prayers and in your heart."

Nick was special to me. His journey to baptism strengthened my testimony so much and for that I will always be grateful. I love him with all my heart, he is such a dear friend. I hope that one day he does talk to me again. But whether or not I ever see him again, I have faith that he will be okay. That one day he will serve a mission, get married in the temple and live the righteous happy life I know that he is capable of, and he deserves that. He deserves all the love in the world. He has such a sweet heart and I pray for him often.

Please pray for my friend Nick. Maybe with all our prayers he will return soon to the gospel that I know, he knows is true.

Longing to Serve - I'm so Jealous

This morning I went to the baptism of a cute little girl named Chloe. She is 9 years old and her daddy finally let her gat baptized. Her grandma, Sis. Papworth, invited me to come to her baptism. I wouldn't miss it for the world!
I haven't been to a baptism since Nick. (I'll tell you about him some other time)
I was so excited to be there. And I felt the Spirit so much. It was awesome. Elder Edge was conducting and he gave the talk on baptism. I never met him before today but he was pretty awesome. He is a great speaker and I was very impressed with how well he welcomed the Spirit into the room for everyone.
Well after the baptism, while Chloe was changing the do a little "Missionary Moment", where a missionary speaks to the guest about the Fist Vision. I've heard it so many times and I will never get tired of it.
At one baptism awhile back when Elder Jeff Rasmussen was a Zone Leader in Stockton he asked me to give the presentation. I was so nervous and I could hardly breath...but then Jeff started making faces at me from the back. I laughed a little and it totally helped me relax. From then on it was all good. I loved giving the First Vision and now everytime I hear it I get jealous.
Today Elder McCalvy gave the presentation. He was so nervous, the poor guy, but he did awesome. The whole time I just wished that I was up there giving it. I love how it just brings the Spirit into the room for everyone. And I can't wait until i'm on my mission and I get to teach everyone that I meet about the restored gospel of Jesus Christ.

The road to "Sister"hood - How it all began.

I spent 5 months in a small town in Virginia attending Southern Virginia University. My major was Theater...with no idea where that would take me I just answered, "because I like the theater?" I came home to Stockton and I knew that I could not afford to go back to school but I was only half way devastated.

May

My parents had become pretty chummy with the Elder's in our ward and they were over for dinner every Wednesday night....and every other day when they'd stop by...oh, just because. We only had Elder Smith for about two weeks since I'd been home and then it was transfer time.

June

Elder Woodward was going on and on about who his new companion was going to be, "this really tall dude with a really long name, Rasputin or something." The very next day being Wednesday, we were supposed to feed the Elder's dinner. I was in charge and I was making Lasagna.
We were running a little late and when we got home the missionaries were already there. Dinner was great. Elder Rasmussen asked me the normal question a Mormon girl gets at my age, "Have you thought about serving a mission?"...and I gave him my normal answer, "not really, no."
He went on about how much he loved serving and just telling cool stories from his 8 months so far. For some reason he really got me excited about missionary work and I really wanted to help some how.
Now I wasn't necessarily thinking about serving my own mission...I was only 19 and had plenty of time to think about it for a girl. But something about his attitude towards missionary work just made me want to help, in any way possible.
He made me think. I soon realized that I really DIDN'T have all that much time! Preparing for a mission takes awhile and I would be 20 in six weeks! So, I did what any Mormon should do in such a sticky situation...I prayed about it. I helped them as much as a could, took reading assignments from them, and genuinely prayed about it.

July

I woke up the morning of my twentieth birthday, and I knew that I wanted to go on a mission. To my mom this came as a bit of a shock seeing as, I didn't even tell anyone that I was thinking about it. It came to me as a shock too.
The Elder's were so excited for me, and eager to help in any way possible. My family didn't really believe me or think that I was capable of such a thing. But no matter what anyone else thought...it was on. Preparation began.
I started going to appointments with the missionaries. I put myself on their schedule, studied hard, attended all my meetings...sometimes twice a week! I was really going for it.

August

I finally found a job. And I had talked to my Bishop about my papers. My goal was April 2nd, 2008. 90 days before my twenty-first birthday.

* * * *

March

Things have been really tough. My eagerness to serve has been a rollercoaster since day 1. My activity with the missionaries has been the same. And my goal has been pushed back to October.
But all in all, I still want to serve a mission for the Church.